Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Surprise?

A lot of people have asked whether we intend to find out whether we are having a boy or girl at the next scan.  I'm not sure whether I want to, but I've been given a lot of advice!  Some people say they found out and it helped them to bond, some people say it's a lovely surprise waiting until it's born.  A lot of people are just too impatient or want to be able to buy blue or pink clothes.

as you can imagine, I'm not a big advocate of pink for girls and blue for boys.  But one thing I've noticed is that a lot of the people who think it helps with bonding are men, and a lot of the people who think it's nice to wait are women.  Not exclusively, by a long way, but my unscientific research appears to show a trend.  I wonder whether it's because women feel the have enough bonding carrying the baby around inside them and want a nice surprise as a reward for their labour?

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

Maybe it's like christmas - it's kinda wrong to unwrap your presents early to see what you've got.

As for clothes colour. Bright green.

Mary Beth said...

We only found out because Joshua showed us his manly bits at the 12-week ultrasound. Otherwise we were just as happy to be surprised. But when Jay found out it was a boy, he just about came out of his shoes. I think he was one of those men who found it easier to bond by knowing the gender.

Eva said...

It is a fair point - it may be very obvious at the scan esp. seen as M. has medical background. What would you do if he figured out the sex?
I think I would agree with your theory, but having said that I'm one of the exceptions. I guess I wanted D. to know so he could extra extra bond and I felt that actually giving birth will be the biggest suprise that my body can actually do that! But everybody's different which is good really.
I've been completely overwhelmed at times by the amount of advice about all facets of pregnancy, childbirth & parenting that we've been given. My one bit of advice (!)which I like to give you is that only you & M. know whats best for you & your little family. Everybody is different - that is why the human race is so diverse.
Still v. excited about our babies being born in the same year! x

Fat Roland said...

Have you figured out my ?

Mary Beth - you do realise, your lad will be surfing the internet in 15 years time and stumble across your comment? "Manly bits? Aaaw, mom!" :)

Sarah said...

Fat Roland, I don't understand what the question mark is supposed to be. Sorry. I'm clearly too stupid to be allowed to blog.

Rachel said...

But Sarah didn't you realise that if your girl-child doesn't wear pink or your boy-child doesn't wear blue then you are GOING TO MAKE THEM GAY!! My mum dressed me in dungarees. Now I'm a feminist. Its her fault.

Sarah said...

I'm writing in my birth plan that I don't want my baby putting in a pink blanket, no matter what comes out.

Merlin said...

Sorry, it helps bonding!!!!!!!!!!! So what did humans do for the thousands of years BEFORE ultrasound was invented?

Sarah said...

I think it's only recently that there's been any expectation that men might bond with their baby, particularly before it is born. I'm reading 'gone with the wind' at the moment, where it's considered totally unacceptable to even refer to a lady's pregnant state most of the time!

1 i z said...

And just to demonstrate how completely out of our control it all is, to counter-balance Rachel's tale of dungarees, I was made to have girl's toys and do the 'girl-things' as a child, whilst always covetting my brother's Action Men/Mechano/Electrical Kits/avoidance of housework. Consequently I rebelled and became a Chartered Engineer that sees housekeeping as an arguable necessary evil that should be resisted whenever possible ;-)

Always sort of resented the girly upbringing, but then again at least I escaped the dungarees. Never a good fashion choice - even with killer heels...