The advert for my job said that I would have to be passionate about helping people. I really am. I came into the job wanting to change society at an individual level. I think a lot of people get a bad start in life and have an impaired ability to make good choices. I think people must be held responsible for their behaviour, but there needs to be some recognition of the circumstances that have shaped them.
I'm finding my job quite difficult. I have to give people difficult answers, tell them we won't be doing everything they want - or at least, not just yet. I tell them that their behaviour is having an unacceptable impact on their community. I try to understand why people fell how they do, explain decisions in a way that makes sense, and represent their opinions to other people in the company.
For this, I get told that my answers are pathetic, that they will hold me personally responsible for the death of family members, that I wouldn't be prepared to live like that. I have tenants hang up on me when they don't like the answer I give, or tell me that all they are asking for is everything they want, straight away.
I find it hard because one of the things that drives me is a desire to make people happy. I understand that sometimes this is a case of making the best of a bad situation - making people happier than they would have been had I not explained things properly to them. But I feel like I really am pleasing none of the people, all the time.
4 comments:
You're not hearing from the people you are pleasing though, only from the vocal minority. What percentage of those 450 actually give you that kind of hassle? I'd bet it's not large.
As long as you're doing your best that's all you can do.. you're not (quite) superhuman, but they'd all be a lot worse off without you.
No, that is true. Estimates seem to be that we spend most of our time dealing with around 5% of our tenants - many are happy to rent a home and live in it, reporting repairs when they need to. Some I'll deal with if they need permission to alter their property or want to create a joint tenancy with someone. And some I'll have a lot of contact with because they're more unhappy about things than most, or find it harder to get on well with their neighbours.
Occasionally tenants are very happy and say so, which is nice. And there are people who I know I've helped, who have no idea just how much I have helped them, and I do get job satisfaction from that - from knowing I've made a difference for someone even if no-one else realises it. And some of it is stuff that needs to be done that no-one is ever going to thank you for, like child protection stuff. I can live with that. It's just the rudeness and unpleasantness which I find a bit tiring - it's a bit like the idea that children think their teachers live at school (though I'm not sure children really do think that) - people don't tend to realise I am a normal person with a real life and who also has difficulties with neighbours and all the things they deal with.
And they don't always realise where their issue sits in the list of priorities - for them it is the most important thing ever and they don't realise I have more urgent/serious things to deal with and a load of other tenants all asking for the same thing.
Those people will always complain about something and to them compromise is a different country. Knowing you I'm sure you are doing a more than capable job so don't worry about lack of positive feedback from your clients. The fact that you question your own work is a good sign you do it well.I work with a similar demographic and the number of thankyou letters in eight years equals none.
I'm confident you great at what you do:)
It is a difficult balance. Finding empathy (not sympathy, an important distinction) while managing to keep your inner self safe. But helping people is not the same as telling tham what they want to hear. And I am certain you do it well. The important thing for you to remember is that they are not being rude and unpleasant to you, they are being rude and unpleasant to the esatblishmt, it just happens that you are teh representation that they can be rude to. We can talk at Greenbelt about how I cope with soem of the rude calls I have received over the years.
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